Louis Tomlinsonis opening up about the “dark times” in his life.
In a new interview withThe Guardian, the One Direction alum spoke about losinghis sister, Félicité,in March, just over two years aftertheir mother Johannah Deakin died of leukemiain December 2016.
“That whole dark side I’ve gone through, it sounds stupid to say, but it gives me strength everywhere else in my life because that’s the darkest s— that I’m going to have to deal with,” Tomlinson, 27, told the newspaper. “So it makes everything else, not feel easier and not less important, but, in the grand scheme of things, you see things for what they are, I suppose.”
The singer also said his fans have been an important support system as he mourns.
“I’m sure every artist says this, but I do believe it,” he said. “We’ve been through some dark times together and those things I’ve been through, they carry a weight, emotionally, on the fans as well. And I felt their love and support. I remember really clearly when I lost my mum, that support was mad.”
Vivien Killilea/Getty
When asked what experiencing the tragedies has taught him about himself, Tomlinson said, “I keep going back to it, but I don’t know if it’s a combination of where I grew up and my mum’s influence, but I just have this luxury of being able to see the glass half-full no matter what.”
The musician also told the newspaper that he’s the oldest of his mother’s seven children, so “there’s no time for me to be sat feeling sorry for myself.”
“I’ve been to rock bottom and I feel like, whatever my career’s going to throw in front of me, it’s going to be nothing as big or as emotionally heavy as that,” he continued. “So, weirdly, I’ve turned something that’s really dark into something that empowers me, makes me stronger.”
“I don’t want people to feel sorry for me,” Tomlinson added. “That’s not how I feel for myself. Somehow it fuels me.”
Louis Tomlin and sister Félicité.
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Tomlinson’s sister Félicité died from an accidental overdose,a coroner concludedearlier this month. She was 18.
Before her sudden death, Félicité, who was also known as Fizzy, worked as a model and influencer. On March 13, she passed out after a suspected cardiac arrest at her studio in West London, and was pronounced dead at the scene when emergency responders arrived to the home, according toThe Sun.
Tomlinsonspoke out for the first time about his sister’s deathin April, thanking his fans for their words of encouragement.
Félicité’s death came after their motherJohannah diedon Dec. 7, 2016. She was 43. Just weeks before his sister’s death, Louispaid tribute to his late motherin “Two of Us” — the first single off of his debut solo album.
“After I lost my mum, every song I wrote felt, not pathetic, but that it lacked true meaning to me,” Tomlinson toldThe Guardianabout the process of writing “Two of Us.” “I felt that, as a songwriter, I wasn’t going to move on until I’d written a song like that.”
“It was like the song I always wished I’d written,” he said. “I went in and put my personal touch to the verses. It was a real moment for me in my grief, and as part of the creative process, because it felt like it was hanging over me.”
source: people.com
