Emily Ratajkowski; Sebastian Bear McClard.Photo: Marc Piasecki/WireImage; Jean Baptiste Lacroix/Getty Images
Emily Ratajkowskiis speaking up about feeling stuck and not knowing how to leave.
The model and activist, 31, who divorcedfilm producer Sebastian Bear-McClardin September 2022 after four years of marriage, said Thursday that she didn’t have the strength to get out earlier.
“I tried to take antidepressants,” added the mom-of-one about “trying everything” to make herself happy. “I was sure there was something wrong with me. I think so much of what I learned coming out of that relationship is to trust your instincts,” she continued.
“Gaslighting is a real thing,” she said to host Eileen Kelly.
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Ratajkowski — who sharestwo-year-old Sylvester Apollowith Bear-McClard — also spoke out about the notion of society pressurizing people to find their forever partner.
“Every piece of media we consume from the second we are born is basically this idea of finding a partner that completes and validates you,” she said about a process she believes makes leaving someone even harder.
“Plus, I had just had a child,” she added, “so I really wanted to have that family, so it was especially hard for me to totally walk away.”
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This all changed for Ratajkowski when she said a line was crossed for the last time. “For me, it was so clear and then it just became clearer and clearer and clearer, which was good, which was clarifying,” she said, without revealing details of the event.
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Ratajkowski and Bear-McClard tied the knot in February 2018, just days after being spotted together for the first time. Although the relationship seemed to form quickly,Ratajkowski later shared onBusy TonightwithBusy Phillipsthat the two had known each other for years before the official start of their relationship.
“He likes to joke ‘yeah everyone thinks we got married quickly, but you vetted me for two years,'” she revealed on the show.
Four years later, they separated. “It was Em’s decision,” a source told PEOPLE in July 2022, “They split recently. She is doing okay. She is strong and focused on her son. She loves being a mom.”
In September, Ratajkowski went one stage further andfiled for divorcein Manhattan Supreme Court — and wasspotted with Brad Pitta couple of weeks later. She has also since spent time with comedians Pete Davidson andEric Andre.
Emily Ratajkowski and son Sylvester.
Aside from constantly getting photographed on her dates, overall, the model said she is looking on the bright side of her new-found freedom.
Through her difficult marriage and divorce, she has also learned how to feel good alone.
“I didn’t understand that it was actually going to be so nice to come back to myself,” she on Thursday’s podcast. “(And) return back to how I see the world, how I understand, things, my instincts.”
source: people.com
